How a person manifests himself in small things - such is he!

Natalya Grace, a talented psychologist and business coach from St. Petersburg, in her book Grace's Laws, formulated a number of patterns that will help you become a little wiser. Here are a few of them. Perhaps they can help you today.

1. The law of zeroing

The brain needs to reset. If you have returned home and are barely on your feet, and only fourteen of the twenty-eight tasks planned for today have been completed, if you have sat down and sit, staring blankly into the void, then do not blame yourself for inefficiency! The brain cannot smoothly follow your orders. He also needs to take care of himself. He must put things in order in all those lumps that you threw into him. At this time, you need the absence of any information from the outside. The brain is "cleared" at this time. This is the nulling. Even the soil ceases to be fertile when, in the seventh year, it is not allowed to rest, but forced to give birth again. This makes her a barren slave. Long live the reset!

2. The Law of False Kindness

We only think that we are helping by solving other people's problems. We exacerbate them. When we forcefully drag an alcoholic into treatment, we only prolong his agony and waste our own time. He will drink again, and we will consider him an ungrateful pig, instead of asking ourselves whether it is worth throwing pearls at all. A person must solve his own problems by himself. He grows as his problem-solving arsenal grows.

3. The law of exponentiality of trifles

How a person manifests himself in small things - such is he! He can be royally generous, but once a year, and petty nature is manifested in small things every day, so the little things are much more revealing.

4. The law of germs

There are germs of phenomena and events. Although these embryos are not alive, they have the ability to reproduce. One left cup will entail a mountain of unwashed dishes. One inscription on a freshly painted fence will soon not be left alone - the entire fence will be written on. How to use the law of germs? All adverse phenomena and events must be recognized in the bud. The germs of all evil must be destroyed. If you do not like some vital phenomenon, eliminate its germ. It is much easier to melt a snowflake than to stop a snowball.

5. Better under- than over-

This applies to absolutely everything. For example, if you are giving a speech, finish it before people get tired. Goethe said: "The secret of the boring is to say everything." Let's go on a date - say goodbye a little earlier than your partner wants to do it. Leave the guests before they yearn for loneliness. Remember: it is better to under- than over- ...

6. Law of the common team

Two horses in one team are able to move 15 tons. But each of them separately - only 3 tons. Harness yourself to work no less than two by two, and you will be effective. "A thread twisted three times will not break soon."

7. Law of the magic word

It turns out that the magic word is NO, not please. Many problems can be avoided if you learn to refuse people. Do not spend time in empty communication "out of courtesy." Don't lend money when you don't want to. This is much better than suffering about whether they will return or not. Give what you can give, but do not lend. Goethe said: "If you want to lose a friend, lend him money."

I discovered an interesting phenomenon. When a person reasonably refuses, his self-esteem rises, self-respect increases. People are afraid to refuse. Do you know why? They are afraid of not being liked! And you can't please everyone. Learn to calmly experience other people's negative emotions about your refusal. If you immediately say “NO”, then it will be easier to argue the refusal. Refuse easily.

8. The law of false ideal conditions

There will never be ideal conditions. It is foolish, of course, to deny that favorable circumstances occasionally occur. It is even rarer for someone to have the wisdom to use them. Partly because the opportunities hide under the guise of problems that need to be addressed.

9. Law of supply

One person, let's call him Mikhalych, wanted to change his motorcycle for a new, more modern one. Mikhalych advertised in the newspaper that a motorcycle was for sale, since he did not have the entire amount to buy a new one.

The model was five hundred shaggy years, so there were no calls on the ad, but at the end of the week one person did call. Mikhalych met with him, and he offered him a very modest price, about three hundred dollars, saying that this motorcycle could only be used for spare parts. Mikhalych became indignant and said that he would sell it for at least a thousand. The client left with a sigh, and it was clear that he was not breaking down, but really not ready to pay more, and left Mikhalych his phone with the words: “If you still decide, call me.”

Mikhalych did not even think of changing his mind about the old horse and did not call. The client himself called back a couple of days later and again offered three hundred dollars, but Mikhalych refused. A week later, when Mikhalych left the office late in the evening, for a long time he could not remember where he had put the motorcycle, until he finally realized that it had been stolen.

Offers are made randomly. Fate thus often takes care of us.

10. The Law Once Set

Once adjusted, it works great!

11. The Law of Compensation

It doesn't happen all at the same time! Can you imagine? .. Wife: beauty, manicure, hairstyle, pies at home do not dry out, in bed with her husband - miracles of ingenuity and passion; children bathe in attention; sings brilliantly, entertains guests by playing the piano; healthy - well, just blood with milk; complaisant, silky character, greets with a smile, a brilliant poetess, a successful business woman, an ideal friend ...

Everything does not happen at the same time, so Napoleon was afraid of cats, Tchaikovsky ate paper and cried up to ten times a day, Suvorov often pretended to be a fool, Schiller, in all seriousness, put rotten apples on the table to feed the muse, and Bach threw a wig at the organist when he was out of tune.

If in something one person has achieved significant success, then in another he usually has a shortage. But a person is valuable not so much by the absence of vices as by the presence of virtues.

12. Law of Influence

The environment affects how a person becomes. In medicine, there is such a thing: the rate of reaction. It is obvious that someone is predestined to be slimmer, someone - fuller. But even within the concept of fullness, you can be a plump handsome man, or you can be flabby and blooming to the point of ugliness. With the same genetics, mind you. This is called the reaction rate. Even if a person does not tear the stars from the sky, then he also has a certain reserve of this very norm of reaction. In one environment it will become developed (even if relatively), and in another it will become primitive. The environment affects a lot, if not everything. We turn into those around us, and much less often turn others into ourselves.

13. Law of the Cross

The cross is given to each in strict accordance with his back.

14. The law of polar reaction to talent

Talented people always cause polar reactions: either delight or hatred. They cannot be taken lightly. They cannot be overlooked or ignored. They are impossible to forget. They are remembered, they are loved, they are hated, they are thought of, they are envied. Therefore, if you are talented, then do not rely on universal approval. Enemies will be already because not all the talents went to them.

15. Law "Not your people"

Not your people will leave you anyway.

16. Law of shared memory

Most of all people are connected by a common memory of events and all sorts of pounds of salt. Attachment and a fairly calm stage of ongoing love are based on a common memory. Thus, getting into memory connects people. If you want a good affection, you will be remembered with a good one.

17. The law of binding thoughts to one's neighbor

A person who is close to us makes us think about ourselves, even if we are not interested in him. This is the danger of the closeness of worthless people.

18. The law of the inevitability of losses

In everything that a person does, he makes mistakes. Therefore, losses are inevitable. Losses are inevitable, gentlemen! Knowing this, one should not be upset too much. Many, but not all, we can control. There are general laws of the universe. We cannot be perfect, and neither can our actions. Accept the inevitable loss with humility. Perhaps it is only needed here.

19. The law of halves

Any picture of the world, any business can be symbolically divided into halves that complement each other. The halves can be called initial and final. It is still possible to set the tone for the initial half, but if it has materialized, then the final half begins to “finish” as if by itself. This is the essence of situation management. You can set the initial half to get the desired end result.

To reinforce this idea, I will give an illustration. You probably tried to understand why some people evoke reactions of admiration and adoration in others? They act like they can't help but like you. If you need to make a speech, then their whole appearance shows: I am ready for applause, and people begin to applaud, completing the soulmate. They look as if they are waiting for a reaction of adoration - and people begin to look interested at first, then fall in love. Set the correct initial half, and success is guaranteed.

20. The Law of Right Action

If a person does the right thing, then his affairs are getting better and better every day.